Throwing Up Makes me Laugh Yo

Overheard while leaving my office building:

“And then he threw up all over me. Projectile vomit everywhere.”

(Giggle giggle) I’ve met many who don’t understand how throwing up is funny, but for those who do, I hope this one is appreciated.

Nobel Prize Whaaat?

There are more thoughts to be shared on this one, but for now, let’s let a sacreligious image do the talking:

A Long Walk for a Tiny Toll

Today, I received a toll charge for a toll I ran (no change, new toll!) in Texas back in February of 2008.

It was persistently forwarded from two different old addresses to make its way to me.

Even better, it’s for $1.60. The postage and processing charges on this alone have surely cancelled out my contribution to Texas tollways.  Eyes on the prize, Texas. Eyes on the 60 cent ($1 adminstration fee) prize…

We Are Spoiled, Indeed

So I came across this the other day– Louis C.K. on Conan O’Brien talking about how everything’s awesome and yet nobody’s happy.

Too true. Go on, laugh at how you fall victim.

All The Single Babies…

Behold! The next internet sensation in the making:

Clearly, Kanye was right about this video’s influence, no? I mean, look at that kick!

Let’s Shake a Fist at Those Damned Hollywood Commies

Will Ferrell stands up for the real healthcare victims by MoveOn.org

PS I love that the dude from Hero’s only says 3 words…IMPACT

Kanye Ain’t Crazy for Swayze

Inappropriate? Perhaps. But hey, he means no disrespect…

And I guess the word is out now that President Obama called Kanye a jackass.  Ohhh sigh. Gotta love that Obama’s almighty presidential opinion on Kanye has spread fast and far while meanwhile his remarks on and plans for universal healthcare have been closed out by folks everywhere. Way to go, America. Priorities.

One Leg After the Other

It’s always funny to me when I realize that I’ve put my underwear on inside out. It’s increasingly funny when I don’t have this observation until 10pm. I guess statistically, given how often underwear is put off and on, you’re gonna get it wrong now and again. But at the same time, when you’ve had so much more practice with this article of clothing, well, it’s a bit of a personal embarrassment to discover.

I suppose, however, unlike other articles of clothing, others aren’t there to immediately let you know that you’ve goofed… in most cases at least. Perhaps others should be consulted for an approving butt smack of approval. Ya know, just something to consider.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, I definitely didn’t fix it.

Craigslist Is For (Booty) Lovers

so cute in the face.. and you had the biggest butt .. ever – m4w – 28 (orange line)

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Date: 2009-08-24, 10:35AM ET

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the whole time i was looken at you because you were too damn cute to look away
then you got up… and i couldnt believe.. your butt was like.. not a kind of big… but it was like .. stop the party big..
you are an amazing creation

//

Barney Don’t Play That Way

At a recent town hall meeting to discuss health care, a young woman asked her representative about Obama’s so-called Nazi policies, showcasing a photograph of the president sporting a Hitler-like mustache. His response:

Yeah, Barney Frank don’t take that ish, dearie. What do you think about this one?