Monthly Archives: May 2009

My Myspace Man: Take 4

Alright, this one is definitely a good one. “MrRecession” writes:

hello pretty lady.. I wish I was your pillow, so you could drewl all over me..

Ya like that one? SO I COULD DREWL ON HIM. Hmm, couple of things:

  1. MrRecession, eh? How’s that handle workin’ out for ya?
  2. LINE. And not even just A line, but a line that is meant for ME to fawn over YOU. Not entertaining enough to be cocky.
  3. Spell check. Drool, buddy. You want me to drool on you. Oof, this girl needs a man with good grammar, g.

I know it’s tough ladies, but yet again, I’m gonna have to go with deny– just let me know if you’re interested though. I can certainly see the appeal  here.

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Filed under Comedy, Culture, Dating, Flirting, random

Five Little Ducks Went Out to Play…

And somehow, 4 of them ended up in a sewer drain in DC earlier this week.

But wait, before you get upset, know that this story has an ADORABLE conclusion.

So, Monday morning, a duck with one little duckling at her side starts going crazy– squawking like mad at sewer drain in an alley. At the sight of this, in a city where people sport Ipods continually to avoid confrontation with crazies or the homeless, the ducks apparently got DC residents to stop in wonder. Residents called city agencies for help, and three nearby firefighters from a station the next alley over came by and removed the sewer drain to see what all the commotion was about. Lo and behold, 4 more little ducks struggling to swim in the water just below.

The duck family was reunited and brought to animal control for a check up. They’ll be released into a friendlier location soon.

Here’s a picture of the mother being held over the baby ducks. Now, call me crazy, but she’s totally smiling. And mind you, I don’t really even like birds. (That whole, birds are dinosaurs! thing totally creeps me out.)

Click the picture for more ridiculously cute pictures--including a firefighter showing how they were rescued. Ham it up, alright. We can't get enough cute news.

Adorable, right? Gah, love it.

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Filed under Current, Entertainment, Family, Nature, news

My Myspace Man: Take 3

Name: Danny lee

Friend Request sent. No picture. Message as follows:

dang boo you is sexy

Gee, as much I love profiles with next to no information and friend requests with no intent at even being fake internet friends, Danny lee ain’t my boo tonight. Oh, and PS, while his status is single, his mood is “TAKEN”–apparently, his girlfriend made him his page. V. classy.

Deny!

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Filed under Comedy, Culture, Dating, Flirting, random

Texts From Last Night: Thanks for the (Otherwise Blurry) Memories

Ohhh the drunken text message. Too crude, too lewd, too much information. If you put it in writing, it can come back to haunt you kids, and the Internet is set to make damn sure of that.

Enter Texts From Last Night, the website that apologetically proclaims, “Remember that text you shouldn’t have sent last night? We do.” Basically, it’s a forum to exploit your friends, because we just didn’t have enough fun tagging questionable photos on Facebook. You enter the text and the area code of the person who sent it, and readers vote on what constitutes a good night versus a bad night. And revel in your friend’s drunken mishaps, of course. The results are certainly something special.

Here’s a sampling of  my recent favorites:

(978): Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.

(651): Last night while we were having sex, ‘God bless the USA’ started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately… so awkward.

(419): just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back…and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked

(818): Jake died.
(310): WTF????????? That’s how you tell me????
(818): Oops typo. Jake cried.

Check it out if you haven’t already, kids. This one will get you itching for your next drunk friend to get textin’

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My Myspace Man: Take 2

“D” writes:

hey sweetie..i know someone as cute as you has a full phonebook , but do you think you can try to squeeze my number in?

going with an old classic, eh? hmm… ya can’t just jump right to the phone number because you used both “cute” & “sweetie.” in this case, d is for deny.

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No Mercy, Kiddies

19. The blog and the image didn’t get along, but 19 is my total. Psha, I’m disappointed that number’s not higher… ha, oh my indeed.

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Nothing Short of Incredible: Face Transplant Pictures Released

This is absolutely incredible. Pictures of the world’s first nearly full face transplant have been released, and I don’t see how anyone couldn’t be in awe of this amazing feat.

Connie Culp, the recipient of the face of a dead woman whose family donated her face to this cause, was shot in the face 5 years ago. Bullet fragments tore up the mid section of her face leaving her with no nose, right eye or upper jaw.The injuries were extensive and life changing, and the mother of two lived a life where children cowered away in fear and called her a monster.

Five months ago, Connie received a face transplant. A team of doctors led by Dr. Maria Siemionow  replaced her lower eyelids, sinuses, upper jaw, nose, skin muscle, bones and more. It’s the world’s first nearly whole face transpant (4 have occurred before although less extensive), and Connie had gone through 30 surgeries before then, undergoing multiple skin graphs, even having bone removed from her ribs to try and help remake the bones in her face.

In case you were wondering, this is Connie before her horrific injuries, here she is:

All photos from AP

Reportedly, Connie’s husband shot her in 2004 before taking a gun to himself. Before the transplant, Connie needed a tube to breath through her windpiipre. She couldn’t eat solid foods or smell. Now she can smell, smile and taste again. During the 22 hour operation on Dec 22nd, doctors remarkably replaced 80% of her face. Doctors say she’ll have to take immune-suppressing drugs for the rest of her life, and they plan to get rid of some of the droopiness and excess tissue as time goes on. Wow. This is one of those instances that inspired you to take pause and think about what we can do… the pain we can inflict, the hurt we can endure, the sacifices we can make, the science we can tame. Truly incredible.

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